This could be an inappropriate post for many. Many righteous beings might find this post blasphemous. Feel free to pass your judgment.
As most of you know, I met my husband when I was 16. After nearly a decade long courtship, we married and had our daughter even before our 1st anniversary. She was preterm but she was 2KG and hence doc said there is no need to keep her in a warmer.
Lo and behold! The couple that was all over the place for so many years had a preterm baby that was not kept inside a warmer. This child is conceived before marriage!
Well, we got married on Nov 28 and had our “premie” on Sep 6. You can calculate for yourself. The human species cannot carry a baby for more than 9 months. So either I should be an elephant or a character in some mega serial to have a longer gestation period. Even after 9 years, the story is doing rounds.
My friends comforted me telling me that even if such a story is going rounds, you married him. So the matter is closed.
THIS IS NOT THE REAL POINT BEHIND MY POST
WHAT IF?
WHAT IF I CONCEIVED BEFORE MARRIAGE?
WHAT IF I DIDN’T MARRY MY CHILD’S FATHER?
WHAT IF I DON’T MARRY AT ALL?
In an era when sex workers are gaining their due respect, girls who conceive before marriage are judged and loathed.
The result!
Kids end up in orphanages. I personally know hospitals that have a tie-up with orphanages to handover these “conceived-before-marriage” kids.
What if these illegitimate kids are born preterm?
When the mother is not ready to claim her child, who will pay for the NICU treatment?
Nobody!
What about their fate?
A whole can of worms will be let out if we ponder more into it.
When will they stop judging an unmarried mother?
When will they shed the sense of entitlement which weighs above humanity?
Above all, when will they learn to wear a condom, for God’s sake?
#motherhood
It is a sad reality of our society. Not sure how long this stigma would be around but hats off to you to raise such a “bold” topic as per societal standards.
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this is a stigma in society and I dont know when will this go away..but it’s time we women raise children who break these conceived notions
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Quite a thouoght provoking post this is. I understand as a spciety we have quite a lotof work to do and make this a bit better place for our future generations 🙂
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There is more to it that just conceiving before marriage. However progressive we may be. You did marry your baby’s father but those who give birth and the father is not around, the kids are bullied no end. Please watch Tribhanga that released recently. As parents, you may have the tenacity to tolerate the jibes but kids are vulnerable and can be scarred for life.
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