Parenting

Puberty In Girls – Every Mother’s Worry

Gone are the days when puberty is considered synonymous with teenagers. As the years go by, girls as young as 8-9 years attain puberty and it is becoming the new normal. As much as we blame the junk food, aginomoto, hormone infused chicken, or milk, we need to be prepared and accept the fact the pubert in girls is a normal process.

Girls grow fast:

My daughter graduated to middle school yesterday. Surprisingly I was not feeling happy about it. I just don’t want her to grow. While I discussed with fellow mothers, a common thought that we shared was the girls grow fast while the boys still remain the molly cuddled little ones. It doesn’t mean that the girls don’t like to be pampered or we don’t pamper them. But yes! They are changing – look-wise, attitude-wise, perspective-wise. One look at her picture a year back brought me to tears. How my baby has changed!

I had enough of panicking and losing sleep over puberty in girls. Come what may our girls have to be there one day. Early or late, they have to be prepared and we have to prepare them.

Prepare them

My daughter has a sort of phobia towards the sight of blood. So the first step into preparation was to let her know that red, slimy, stinky blood would come out of her intimate area without panicking her.

We had ditched the baby talks about private parts long back. So, they are no longer caught off-guard with the terms Vagina and Penis.

Let them know that the genital area around the vagina is called vulva.

Educate your boys along

I had my seven-year-old son sit with me while I was explaining puberty in girls to her. His reaction was “wow boys are so lucky. We don’t have to face this”. The basic thought ingrained in us was coming naturally to my boy. Now, it was time to address this. To let him know that not having to bear the pain and discomfort doesn’t make him superior. I told him that girls are bearing the pain every month for a generation to come by. I am quite not sure if I put it the right way.

The next question my daughter asked was that, if I don’t want kids in future, why should I bear the pain unnecessarily.

This caught me off-guard. Why? Because I was not prepared myself.

Prepare yourself

Make sure you are prepared to face the uncomfortable questions. Primarily, while preparing your kids don’t portray periods as something unfair. While we women would find it unfair in the long run, I think you should not sow the seed of the “unfair” thought in your child.

I told them that periods happen to women because they are strong enough to handle it. Was I being sexist to my son? I genuinely don’t know. But at that point I didn’t know a better way to put it.

Prepare yourself to accept the fact that your little being is going to undergo the natural changes, like it or not. Keep your emotions in leash.

Observe the changes

Common signs of puberty would be the following

  • Breast buds develop
  • Hair growth in the armpits and pubic area
  • Growth spurt
  • Developing acne

While these are the most common signs, some girls sweat more, show mood swings, or become quieter.

Sex educate them

To let them know about intercourse is very important. Their curiosity would be at its peak and if you don’t want them to develop any unscientific thoughts about sex, educate them well. Tell them that the feeling of attraction that they might feel to a boy would be normal. Don’t beat around the bushes when they ask their doubts. Be clear and explain.

Let them know their body

Would you be surprised if I tell you that there are still women out there who don’t know about clitoris, G-spot or orgasm for that matter. Not girls, but full grown women with kids even. Don’t shy away from explaining everything appropriate to their age.

Make sure your child doesn’t have to depend on external sources gain knowledge about their body and sex at large.

Keep cotton pads handy

Keep a cotton pad inside your daughter’s bag even if she has not had her first periods. We cannot predict when this big change would come knocking at the door. Let them be prepared and teach them how to use it.

Puberty in girls and boys is something that we cannot control but we can very well control how they handle it. Don’t be their friends but be their friendly parents.

29 thoughts on “Puberty In Girls – Every Mother’s Worry”

  1. I have gone through this phase. My daughter had a girl’s talk session when she was in 5th grade. But before that session, I talked to her and gave a an overview. Now she is in 7th Grade and has taken health as one of the subjects. I had to explain her a few other things. And as you said, we have to educate them.

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  2. Rightly said, Its necessary to educate the girls about puberty in a friendly manner. And pREPARING THEM BEFOREHAND IS always recommended.

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  3. My daughter’s just 6 and I already dread the day my poor baby will have to go through this pain. It’s natural though and talking it out to avoid panic is the best thing.

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  4. As a teenage girl, I know how hard it is to have that kind of communication with one’s parents, and seeing that kind of effort from the parents’ side does make us feel a lot better to be honest. Yes, this is the time kids are given sex ed!

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  5. I’ll definitely share this, as a aunt of two growing girls and a mom of a toddler I can understand how important is this for them. Thnx for sharing this dear 😙😙💟

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  6. Great tips. I’m still thinking about how to approach her with the intercourse bit. At that age, I was horrified when I learnt what it was and that I was a product of it. Hahahaha.

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  7. Though I am not a mother yet but these tips are really useful for everyone. This should be discussed with daughters in a friendly manner. I would definitely consider this.

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  8. Yes I agree preparing yourself is must first. puberty is a challenging phase of life that brings lots of physical, mental and emotional changes. if we educate your kids properly, then transition become smooth.

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  9. Very nice article. You have explained well how we can educate our daughters in this regard. Its very helpful for all the moms out there👍

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  10. Keeping the child informed and educated is necessary. And like you rightly did, do it with both boys and girls. I see young girls hitting puberty by 9 and 10 and I was shocked earlier but now preparing myself 1st for my daughter is almost 8 and soon I will have to prepare her for the changes in her body.

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  11. I so agree, this is the most delicate and important phase and girls really need the proper guidance and knowledge. You have shared this so nicely.

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  12. Strongly agree with this that we cannot control puberty to come into our boy and girl, but yes, educating them carefully beforehand makes the thing easier for both of us as a parent and as a teen.

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  13. This is such an important topic that needs to be spoken about and you have mentioned all the things very well.Just curious, what did you answer your daughter when she asked “why go through childbirth cos it’s gonna be painful?”

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  14. Even I have an 8 years old daughter and I always dread the day when she will attain puberty. However, to make it easier for her I have prepared her with all the necessary information related to puberty and how she can always turn to me fir support and information

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  15. agree with you that it is best to have open conversations so that the girls can ask their questions, be comfortable and understand that puberty is natural and part of growing up.

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  16. Absolutely it’s very important that a mother should make her daughter feel comfortable and help in understanding puberty changes

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  17. Being a mother of a daughter it’s really important for me to educate my daughter about puberty and your post has helped me out thank you so much for sharing.

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  18. Puberty is a big change in life. So it’s very important to explain them everything and prepare them in advance so they can understand what exactly is happening with them.

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  19. Another nice and practical topic shared by you. The questions are arising into their mind, that’s a good sign but need to convey the right information with the right approach. Yes, kids are very smart nowadays, so giving them advance lessons might keep away from wrong info.

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  20. I agree with you,I still remember my first period and that’s so horrible just because no one told me about that thing. So, awareness is important! Great topic.

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  21. Absolutely right. It is important to teach kids about puberty at the right time. My older son turned 11 last month and I have been explaining the concepts to him.

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